2015: Year In Review

Status: What a bitchin year.
Song: Crooked by G-Dragon because TONIGHT WE'LL BE CROOKED TOGETHER

Every year I make this obligatory post which is one of the few things I did during my study week.

For previous year posts, refer herehere, herehere and here.

2015 is ending soon. Never have I ever been so relief for a year to end like 2015.

Personally, 2015 is a year of relearning about myself and learning to let go of things.

As usual, I'm going to start the list with the easiest :
Songs of 2015
Again, reminding everyone that all of these songs do not represent high quality of artistry/musical talent nor were released in 2015 but they were the songs that held close to my heart.
On a side note, I can't seem to leave k-pop. 

  1. I by Taeyeon. The song that just keeps on giving and the song that brought me to tears on the first listen because I yearned so much to that level of peacefulness that Taeyeon sang.
  2. Stitches by Shawn Mendes. This is my go to song to sing during driving. Feels.
  3. Lies by BIGBANG. This song was and still the best BIGBANG song I've heard even though it's been 7 years. Not going to lie, I listen to this song on repeat every morning on my way to class.
  4. Call Me Baby by EXO. Pretty boys with smooth moves were the reason I got into k-pop again.
  5. Catal Rhythm by OLDCODEX. I miss good ol anime sports songs. ALSO TAKAOOOO <3 comment-3--="">

Sehun was so gay, no wonder Seungri sat in his lap.

Shows of 2015 

I don't remember what movies nor tv shows I watched.

This is an iconic moment for me. Much homo.
I think at the peak of my obsession with EXO boys was watching EXO Next Door. This fanfiction web series was everything to me. I was rolling around, squealing watching the series. I considered myself a trash for EXO when I started humming the OST to this series. 

Another highlight was Kuroko No Basuke. It was a nice reminiscence of Slam Dunk though nothing could beat Slam Dunk. 

Star Wars: The Force Awakens is a big highlight for me as well. Brings back so many memories of watching the movies couple of times and playing their games during my school days. I was really overwhelmed when the original cast appeared on screen. 

Then Digimon came back. What a time to be alive. Even though Taichi left his manliness back in the Digital world. Yamato still a bae. 

People of 2015

I had despised myself, my friends and my family. 
I had loved and adored them as well.

But the only rays of light in all of these complicated feelings and thoughts are Lee Seunghyun, Seungri and Zhang Yixing, Lay.

I have lost count on how many times Seungri managed to make me smile when life is going nowhere but downwards. It's entirely silly to be thankful for someone who don't even know of your existence but I couldn't get through this year without this dumb, flirty, extra lil shit, rude fella. What a bunch of losers, aren't we?
Epiphany of 2015
After years of being on social networking sites since the dawn of Yahoo! Group, to filter-heavy of MySpace and now, ever fake as fuck, Instagram, it made me realized how easy it is to be immersed into the worldly feeling of  'EVERYONE MUST KNOW WHAT I AM THINKING, EATING, WEARING REGARDLESS OF HOW OFFENSIVE IT IS'.

This blog is literally one of the prime example.

It made me wondered why do people want to read about my lowly, irrelevant opinions.

Meanwhile, I instinctively blocked my Facebook friends whenever they post offensive, dumb, ignorant, degrading status because I do what I want. Now, my Facebook is filled with people who keep sharing those short cooking videos where no one will ever try because we're all lazy fucks and those look fake.

Most of the accounts I followed on Twitter is newsfeed. I rarely see my friends' tweets and sometimes I have no mood to read whatever the hell my friends are doing or worse, thinking.
This goes with Instagram as well where I once got jealous of Seungri's YOLO way of living while I was slaving away to FYP instead of oh-I-dont-know, my friends getting married because I still don't see the bright side of early marriage.

Yet, I put a lot of my thinking effort in writing out my caption for a picture and writing out tweets.

I may have reached the highest level of narcissism. I think I am a celebrity. HAHA. What a joke and a garbage I have become.

Downgrade of 2015

Just like this lame ass title, my English is so bad, I started to write in Malay. Even though my BM skill is much worse than English.

Also, my taste in men. Down in the drain, among the trash like Seungri. HAHA. FML.
I also found G-Dragon attractive when he obviously has zero taste in anything except in music and he has money. Have you seen his questionable taste in tattoos, hairstyles and clothes? Or his Instagram filter??
Everytime I thought GD could be good-looking, I remember how he used to look like this:
I'm so sorry but I love you. 

I would say my taste in music as well but my trash taste in music is my pride. (ENGLISH IS WHAT).

My pointer because pffttttttttttttt.

Emotional Breakdown of 2015

There were a lot of emotional breakdowns this year.
Remember that one time, I was walking alone to my college on a cloudy evening while listening to Daesung's Baby Don't Cry and I cried? Good times.

I once cried to G-Dragon's Crooked and Ailee's I Will Show You because I was angry and I hated everyone.

I was full on snots and tears running down my face watching Korean dramas and Taeyeon's MV. I consider that as my low point.

I also cried during one episode of Supernatural because Sam was so lonely, he had an imaginary friend. That episode was horrible for my lonely heart.

Then, there was that one time my roommates weren't in the room and I full on cried so hard because I hate everyone again and sports.

I mean, there were a lot of emotional turmoils and stress that I fell sick a few times. Let me tell you, I don't fall sick that easily. I usually got sick once a year.

What have I learned from all of these?

I need to share my feelings. Even though I have the ego of the size of the Sun and I like to think I am incapable of having stupid feelings, I do need to share my feelings with someone.

Only I don't have that someone in spite of all the friends I have around me.
Because I'm picky. I have high standards when it comes to best friend.

Silver Linings of 2015
With all of the emo stuff I wrote above, you'd think I have zero happiness in my life.

I was being overdramatic.

There were 3 significant moments from 2015 that I personally felt pure happiness.

1.First one was that time I skipped a class to meet up the girls. That weekend was so much fun.
I got to experience first hand of Qila's near death driving skills. Much enjoy.
I got to enjoy ice skating surprisingly.
I got to taste the famous boat noodle which was bleh and Magnum cafe.
I got to roam around Sephora which is expensive but woah.

It was the best weekend of 2015. I love them so much , what would I do without them?

2. The next one was that one time I got to experience 'culture' in the form of musical theatre at Istana Budaya. That was fun but the highlight was the midnight ride back home.

Something about driving in my favourite city at midnight with the windows rolled down felt so liberating. So young and alive.

3. The last one was that one time I turned into a fangirl and spam my Twitter on the night of MAMA 2015. It was so great to be back as that insane fangirl.

It would have been better to watch it with someone else but you can't always get what you want.

4. Bonus, my getaway to Sabah with my family. I miss that house by the beach so much and waking up at dawn just to look at the Sun rise.

I miss that feeling of peacefulness.

Discovery of 2015
Last but not least, my revelation into womanhood.


This may sound unbelievable regardless of the rumors, I used to only cleanse my face and apply acne cream everyday.

Obviously that is not the way of woman.

Apparently, I found out on Internet that Asians have complex skincare routine.

I was mindblown and horrified that I have been taking care of my skin the wrong way.

So now, I have cleanser, toner, and moisturising cream. :D

Clearly, Asian skincare routine has more steps than that but I'm too broke and lazy to apply serum or essence on my face.

Besides that, I apparently found a great enjoyment in doing facial mask. This is basically my favourite part of weekend. There is something relaxing about facial mask. Especially, when your face is shiny with all the esssence from facial mask and you lather on more moisturising cream. It's so cooling and therapeutic. Just the right feeling before going to bed.

Once I tried SkinFood Black Sugar Mask (Thanks to Anis), my face felt so cleaned like what the fuck I love skincare so much.

Likewise, I found myself enjoying shopping for skincare products which is why I want to go to Korea so much because skincare products are cheaper there.

So, yeah. My big step into womanhood this year is skincare.
Hello flawless skin 2k16 lol.

In conclusion, it has been fun and sucked a lot for 2015.

I have a lot to say but then again, who else is reading this? If the post seemed a little too bitter and emo, it's because I've been listening to Crooked on repeat. That song is a mood-changer and I might be attracted to GD whenever I listen to this song.

2015 got me feeling crooked.


Leave me alone
I was alone anyway
I have no one, everything is meaningless
Take away the sugar-coated comfort
Tonight, I’ll be
Will you not say anything for me tonight?
I didn’t know being alone would be this hard
Will you be my friend tonight?
On this good day, this beautiful day, this day where I miss you
Tonight, I’ll be crooked 
- Kwon Jiyong, Crooked.